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Free Discipleship Video

I love short videos, especially free ones, that convey a complex point in a simple manner.  This one is all about discipleship.  I found it via ChurchLeaders.com

7 Ways the Church Can Better Reach the Millennial Family

In the past several years the Church attracted generations of families based upon the fact that it was what those generation’s forefathers had done before them, so they just stuck with it.  There was always a common bond that tied families to the church.  Those bonds included:  the community in which they lived, the similarities in economic status, jobs of a similar type, a common race, familial relations, and several other types of criteria that people used to identify with each other.  While these things are not bad in unifying a group of individuals within a church body, they can be some-what isolating.  Paul made it clear in Ephesians 4:1-6 that our unity within the church body isn’t to be based upon our personal similarities but rather the fact that there is only one God and His one work of salvation.  That is the common bond that we should all share with other believers to unite us together.  Unfortunately that has not been the case and we have allowed our insignificant differences to separate us from one another.

One of the major issues facing the local church is a lack of young families and they are more culturally diverse than any other generation before them.  While this group of young families may seem minor right now (they don’t have high paying jobs, they don’t contribute as much to the overall giving to the church, and they may seem disinterested in the traditional church attendance) in the next ten to fifteen years they are going to be a force like no other before them.

Many at this point, would ask the question, “If they are going to be a tremendous force in the next ten to fifteen years, why should we begin concerning ourselves with them now?”  In the simplest answer possible, if we do not begin to evolve our methods of how ministry takes place we will lose this next generation family.

Lifeway Research completed a study on individuals who were born between 1980 and 1991, these individuals are the new “young family.”  Amid tremendous amounts of other information one specific thing caught my attention.  Out of 1200 people surveyed within this age range only 31 percent strongly agree with John 14:6.  They (Lifeway) also discovered that there is a mass number of young adults that are leaving the church because they do not find it relevant to their lives.

Here are a few things that we as church leaders can begin to do in an effort to slow this decline and develop this group into the next generation of Kingdom Builders.

1.       Develop New Forms

• When it comes to the overall direction of the church there are two main points that are discussed most often:  form and function.  The essential function of the church has to encompass at a minimum two things.  The first is that the church exists to glorify God.  The second function that the church is called to fulfill the Great Commission.  These two things take place in a variety of ways, which is what we call “form”.  We always must carry out the “function” of the church and that can never be lost but the “form” in which that is accomplished can be extremely diverse.

2.      Develop New Ways to Live Life Together

• Sunday school has been the traditional method used by most churches in the past century to create a sense of community within the body of a church.  Most churches use the “Sunday School Hour” to categorize groups of people (usually based upon age) in an effort to surround them with people that may be facing the same or similar life conditions.  While there is nothing wrong with this approach I believe that it is important that more interaction take place outside of the four walls of the church building.  Millennial families are looking for people that they can live their life with not just a group that they meet with once a week for an hour.  It is essential for the church to encourage leaders to take people into their homes and spend time with them on a regular basis.  Not just in a one on one setting but also in a group gathering.  We can learn more people in a two hour period outside of the church than a whole year of Sundays.

3.      Develop Outreach that Impacts Lives

• One of the marks of this millennial family is that they have a deep desire to make an impact on the world around them.  They have a desire to be a part of something bigger than themselves and affect their world in a positive way.  While international mission trips to Jerusalem, Peru, Pakistan, Europe, and Africa are great, millennial families can only have limited involvement with such events without abandoning their children or their spouses.  The young family wants to be useful at impacting their community in which they are living.  Creating a church culture of community involvement and taking care of the areas in which the church resides is a sure fire way to motivate this younger generation family to invest their time and resources.

4.      Develop a Community, not just a church

• This point goes hand in hand with the previous ones because as a church we should encourage our members to not only function well within the four walls but also outside of the building of the church.  We should develop a mentality of community as a church body.  As we live life together and do ministry together we (the church) should be ministering to the needs of one another.  This has a great impact on this new type of family because they see people involved and making a difference in the lives of people around them.

5.      Develop Opportunities for Individuals to Grow

• Another major draw for the young family is knowing that the church they are coming to serve and spend their time and energy in will give them opportunities to grow into other areas and provide them with additional training that will assist them in that process.  When the millennial family feels as if they have reached the peak of where they can go within a local body of believers they are more likely to become disinterested and unengaged.

6.      Develop Disciples who Disciple

• Most millennial families want to know what it is that God has called them to do as spouses and as parents.  We need to not just tell them, “This is what the Bible says…”, but we also need to provide them with the opportunities to develop, learn, and implement those skills.  Families that have these desires want to, in turn; share what they have learned with others who may not be as far along in the process as they are.  They want to make an impact and teach the next group of families that are coming up behind them.  The young families behind them desire the same thing because the last thing that most millennial families want is someone, outside of their blood relation, that is twenty years older than them telling them how they did it twenty-five years ago.

7.      Develop an Appreciation for Technology

• As a church we should develop an appreciation for the technological advances that the internet has to offer.  Our young millennial families are kept abreast about the latest events because of their technological involvement.  Skype, Facebook, Twitter, MySpace, Foursquare, Blogger, etc are all forms in which this generation keeps in constant contact with the world around them.  While there are many possible pitfalls in this social networking web there is also a great deal of benefits.  Keeping leaders and the church in front of these young families through social media is an essential tool for reaching out and keeping the activities of the church in the forefront of the busy lives of the millennial family.

KidMin Decor

The first day of school will usually set the tone for the rest of a school year for the typical middle/high school student. The general school population will make judgments upon an individual’s apparel and grooming habits long before that individual has an opportunity to open their mouth. An potential employer works in the same manner as a high school student. You will be judged first upon your appearance and second on your abilities. If the employer has two individuals to choose from that have the same education and work history they will more than likely choose the one who has groomed his or herself better. In some cases employers even choose the individual with less education and work experience because of the professional style that they have in their appearance.

While we are always being told, “Don’t judge a book by it’s cover”, the facts are, we do. In all actuality, we probably have a good reason to make a decision upon what our first impression is. While this does not need to be the standard that we hold our lives to we can definitely pull some good information from first impressions.

When you dream of an ideal children’s department more than likely you have images similar to this go through your mind:

A place that is warm, inviting, creative, and colorful. Parents want to know that when they drop their children off for church they are going to a place that cares for them and is willing to invest in their child’s needs. While appearance isn’t everything, the current state of a Children’s Department is a pretty good indication about how the church as a whole feels about children. The last place that a parent wants to drop their child off is a place like this:

In an effort to bring a little more color to our children’s program we have started making small changes to make the experience here a little more inviting. Here are just a few themes that we have added to show our excitement over the children that are coming to worship with us.

Look around the children’s department at your church. What is your church saying to families?

By the way, the images above are from an awesome creative group that have spent countless hours working toward transforming kids departments all over the country, Creative For Kids.

Permission given for use of images by www.creativeforkids.com

Balancing Our Children’s Diversity – 13 to 24 Months

A few weeks ago we discussed how to make family worship time applicable for all the age ranges that we may have in a normal family dynamic.  I want to dig a little deeper on a few of the age break downs that I have in a previous post.  This week I am going to be examining some of the best methods of imparting Biblical truth into your 13 – 24 month old.

There are a lot of people that would say that trying to teach children of this age anything of theological value is pointless.  I would disagree vehemently.  This is the perfect opportunity to you to put tons of biblical truth into a child.

Paul David Tripp gives the example in his Getting to the Heart of Parenting Seminar of the vocabulary expertise of a one-year-old.  The simple mistake of a one year old saying the phrase, “I throwed it”, is tremendously intelligent.  The parent of that child did not teach them that when speaking about something that occurred in the past tense that they needed to add an “ed” on the end of a word.  The child figured it out.  They discerned that while speaking in the past tense the normal procedure is to add an “ed” to the action within the sentence.  I am sure that was never discussed, but they figured it out.

Also when giving correction to your child about what they should or should not do, they are able to rightly discern the clear choice of right or wrong.  For example, if you tell your child not to play with the box fan that is sitting on the chair, they understand what you are saying.  That is why at some point in the near future they will walk up to that box fan and reach to touch it.  But just before they do they will stop, turn, and look at you to see how you are going to react to their defiance of your rules.

In the same way children are capable of being taught biblical truths the same way that we teach them right and wrong.  You don’t tell them to stop playing with the wall outlet just once, your intentionally repetitive.  Biblical truths should be taught the same way.  You cannot explain to them that God made all of the animals and expect them to get it the first time.  Teaching them has to become a way of life for your children to fully understand the magnificence of God.  This isn’t to say you need to become a hyper-spiritual person who looks at every available opportunity to beat your children over the head with Jesus.  But it is something that you are called, as a parent, to do throughout the day in the life of your child.

When it comes to doing family devotion time, simplifying the overall truth to your child’s level is the best way to incorporate them into the conversation.

Deuteronomy 6 commands parents to be teaching their children as they sit/walk/lie down/rise up.  This is a continual process throughout the day of sharing the truths of God with your children.

• God Made Mommy
• God Made Daddy
• God Made (Childs Name)
• God made the trees
• God made the lights
• God made the sky
• God Loves Us

Sometimes children will not verbally acknowledge that they understand what you are teaching them. This is not the most important part.  It is vitally important that you beginning investing and putting energy into cultivating a relationship with God into your children.

Often at such a young age children will start off by saying “God” and then pointing or looking at the object which God made. This is tremendous progress and it will give you encouragement to continue the process of discipleship.

Praying with your children is another method to teaching your young children about how we respect God.  Taking the time to sit with your child every single night and pray with them will only encourage them to participate in the activity.  After doing this every night for a couple of weeks your child will begin praying with you.  Albeit, you will not be able to understand them but they will begin to mimic your actions by praying with you.

Remember this; you are the first example of Christ that your children will see.

Teaching Our Children Theology

Bibliology.  Theology Proper.  Christology.  Pneumatology.  Angelology.  Anthropology and Hamartiology.  Soteriology.  Ecclesiology.  Eschatology.  Wow!  What an incredible array of Doctrines that we hold so preciously.  But what do each of these doctrines mean?  It is easy to pick up on a few of them, i.e. Bibliogy, Christology, or Angelology.  While some of the others are a little more elusive in their descriptions.  These words can be quite intimidating to any individual, but especially a new believer.  Even as parents we have a tendency to look at these doctrines and think that there is no way we can learn them, much less teach them to our children.

While the task may seem daunting, it is essential.  Many of these doctrines are the very foundation of our faith.  In order for us to cultivate and disciple our children to have a “grounded in the word” faith we must be willing to teach them these essential truths.  Luckily, we are able to get a lot of help in this area.

Bruce A. Ware, author of Big Truths for Young Hearts, has done a magnificent job of breaking down these doctrines so that they are easily understood and explained.  He handles difficult topics such as the Trinity, Sin Nature, and The Holy Spirit.  There are ten different sections in the book and each of the sections is broken down into five or six subsections which help explain the doctrine taught in that section.  Each subsection is made up of only one or two pages.

This book can be used as a daily or weekly devotional for you and your children.  I would encourage any parent that wants to teach their children the essentials of the faith to purchase this book and use it throughout their childhood as a means to cultivate a right understanding of God.

I got it here:  Amazon.  But can get it at one of these places:  Here. Here. For a taste of the book go here:  Sample

Kids Camp 2011

This years kids camp is going to be a little bit different.  As you may have seen in a previous post, our camp theme is Minding Our Manners.  This is not a series of lessons that will help teach children to be better behaved.  It is about teaching children a proper response to the gospel.  The gospel will be laid at the  feet of the children through story, song, play, and entertainment.  Using the story of a restaurant owner, Luigi, and his manager, Monticello, the children will see the struggle that Monticello faces as he must make the decision about whether to obey his boss, Luigi, or go his own way.  Through this story the children will see that they have a decision to make in life, they can either honor Jesus as Lord and accept the gift that he freely gives or they can go their own way and pretend like they are in charge.

Afterward the children will be taught how God wants us to respond to the Gospel:  Sorry, Thank You, and Please.  Sorry, God, that I have not treated you as the ruler that you are.  Thank you for sending your Son, Jesus, to take my punishment for the things that I have done wrong.  Please forgive me, and help me live with Jesus as the ruler of my life.  Some children may not fully grasp the implications of such a decision and will postpone an answer, we are alright with that.  If a child does make a statement of faith to accept Jesus as their Lord and Savior then we will spend an incredible amount of time discussing it with the child and the child’s parents to insure that the child understands the meaning and gravity of such an important decision.  The faith of our children does not need to be built upon a signature on the back of a card, but rather, the foundation of Scripture.

In preparation for Kids Camp 2011, we are handing out a giving guide.  As a result of the economic crisis that our country is facing and taking into consideration the impact that it can have on families with children we wanted to provide our church with the opportunity to reach out and minister to the needs of those families.  Every year we have a few individuals that are faithful in sponsoring a child  or multiple children to go to Kids Camp.  This year we wanted to open up that opportunity to the general congregation.  We have created a few different ways that people are able to give:  per verse sponsorship, contributing to our food fund, and sponsoring a specific child.  Each of these methods will help us reduce the overall cost of Kids Camp which will, in turn, reduce the cost per child.  Our goal is to provide every child that wants to go an opportunity to attend camp without having to worry about whether or not they have enough money.

Check Out It Out!

Giving Flyer Front

Giving Flyer Back

Balancing Our Children’s Diversities

For the past couple of months the we have used the As For Me and My House Moments to work our way through the Old Testament with our children.  This has been a wonderful opportunity to take a few minutes out of the week and share the truths of scripture with our children.  Over these past couple months a have received a few questions about styles of learning and how to make the material fit the age ranges that are found in a particular family.  Sometimes families that have 5^th graders also have 1^st graders in them.  Also, sometimes, 3^rd graders may have siblings that are 4 years old.  When parents have such a gap in ages sometimes it is difficult to make their family discipleship time applicable to all the ages without alienating one particular age.  If you teach down to the younger child the older child can become bored and uninterested in learning such elementary truths.  While if you teach up to the older child the younger can become distracted by something that is more on their level of understanding.  As a result of this, the question that I am commonly asked is, “How do I make our family Bible study time applicable to everyone?”

One important aspect that you must keep in mind when preparing for your family Bible study time is that the Bible is an adult book.  It has adult problems, adult themes, and is written by adults.[i] Explaining these adult problems is sometimes difficult when we have to share with our children what is going on in a passage of scripture.  What we need to avoid doing, is to take a passage of scripture and moralize it into a nice principle that we attach to a holy life style.  While it is good to teach our children to get along with others, not hitting their siblings, and sharing, it is not the main theme behind every passage of scripture.  In the story of Jesus feeding the 5000, there is a tendency to share with children the role of the little boy who shared his lunch.  The story isn’t about the little boy, it’s about Jesus.  This miraculous act was just another one in many that revealed that He was the Messiah.  In John 6:30 and 31 the question was asked of Jesus, “Then what sign do you do, that we may see and believe you? What work do you perform?  Our fathers ate the manna in the wilderness; as it is written, ‘He gave them bread from heaven to eat.”  If they had only paid attention they would have noticed when He miraculously provided food to the masses.  He was providing them with manna to eat and they didn’t even realize it.  The story is about Jesus and the mighty acts that He preformed.  It was about showing the people that He is the Lord.  It has some sharing in it but the big picture is that we can trust in Jesus because He is the Messiah.  This leads us, as parents, to an opportunity to share the gospel with our children.  The story is about Jesus and the fulfillment of scriptures so that he could come and live a life on earth, perfect and blameless and then die for our sins on the cross.  We cannot water down the gospel by moralizing the stories within the Gospel.  D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones wrote that there is not a special gospel for different age groups, it is the same Gospel, but we must adjust only our method and procedure, never the scriptures.[ii]

The next step is to work on the method and procedure part of family Bible study time.  This is where you can begin to build a study time that works best for the different dynamics or age ranges that are found in your home.  Younger children (13 – 24 months) are growing in their vocabulary and are imitating sounds and words.  They especially love to sing, although no words come out they still try to hum or mumble along with songs.  Children at this age love repetition.  This is also the stage that children begin to become more aware of an adult’s presence in a room.  Parents can use this important stage in a child’s life to share the image of God with their children through their actions and attitudes.[iii]

Two and three-year olds run on a bit busier schedule than their younger counter-parts.  This age group loves movement, of any kind.  They love running, jumping, climbing, and walking.  They are a constant source of movement and curiosity.  They are especially excited about visual learning, such as seeing a picture of what they are learning or even better they enjoy being able to hold what they are learning about.  This age range is also highly enthusiastic about repetitive phrases; i.e.  “Jesus loves me.” “Jesus made me.”  “Jesus made mommy and daddy.” [iv] [v] This is also a perfect age to really dive into praying with your children.  Be repetitive in your prayers.  This is a simple prayer that we pray with our 3-year-old, almost 2-year-old, and 3 month old.

Thank you, God for this day and everything that you have done for us.  Thank you for mommy, and for daddy, and for Micah, and for Kinsey, and for Baby Noah.  Thank you SO much for making our hands and our feet and thank you for loving us.  A-MEN.

Every night for the past year or so we have prayed this prayer.  Now it is to the point that our 3-year-old is able to say most of it with us and our 2-year-old is picking is up quickly.  Albeit this is not the Apostolic Creed, but it is a start to teaching our children that we need to spend time in prayer.

The Kindergarten age (4 – 5 years old) is a very excited time that children begin thinking more cognitively.  They are able to learn and ask questions about thoughts or ideas that they may have had.  Their thinking tends is more concrete and does not follow any line of logic at this age.[vi] When you tell a 4 year old that Jesus gives us a new heart when we accept Him as Savior and Lord of our life, they could be terrified.  Imagine what that sounds like to a child that doesn’t think in the abstract, but the literal.  Their thinking is concrete, what you say is what you get.  The great thing about this concrete thinking is that, the majority of the time, they accept truth without question.

• God Created the World
• Jesus is God’s Son
• God is good, powerful, and He loves me.

They accept the truths of God’s Word with no hesitation at all.  This is the time when children are able to share Bible stories with others.  They are able to repeat what they have learned from God’s Word.  It is important that we, as parents, use this opportunity to test the accuracy and truthfulness of the stories that they are learning.  Provide guidance and direction for truths that are not fully understood.

Primary aged (6 – 7) children are eager to learn and do so, normally, by asking a lot of questions.  While they are better at it than the younger children, they still have a problem spending vast amounts of time in one area.  They like to be able to cut and print and use the creative parts of their mind in learning.[vii] They want to be listened to and then responded to once they have shared what they are thinking.  They like to be involved in the learning process not just hear the story; they have a desire to live or act out the story.  In this age range we are able to expand past the simple phrases of the 4 and 5 year olds and we are able to move into the realm of application of Biblical truths; i.e.  “Jesus is God’s Son and my friend, and he teaches me how I should live.”

The middle years (8 and 9 years old) of childhood are a tremendous mile-stone.  On average, children in this age range are in a weird stage of attachment to family but playing with the idea of separating from their family; participating in activities that are away from their immediate family[viii].  They are still interested in learning, but their sources of learning are expanding outside of the home.  They begin to learn new information from their peers and begin making critical decisions about who they are friends with.  The concepts that were established with your child when they were younger must be built upon for further insight into the nature of God. Now your children, not only have an understanding that God is wise, powerful, knowing and loving but that he is all-wise, all-powerful, all-knowing, and always loving.

As children move into the ages of ten and eleven you will begin to see that they are able to share with others what they know about God.  They will begin to feel more secure in what they believe to be true and they will also have an awareness of cultivating their relationship with God.  Unfortunately, this stage also brings awareness to their desires and impulses.  They have a tendency to begin challenging authority and criticizing the adults that are over them.[ix] They tend to choose adults to idolize and to model their life after. They will eat, sleep, and drink these people that they have made as an idol.[x] Children at this stage want to make their own choices and come to their own conclusions about everything that they face.  Parents, we have to be even more aware of the way that we are living our life during this stage of childhood.  Children tend to become very critical of family members whose lives don’t match up to their belief system.

After explaining these different age categories and examining the natural tendencies and abilities of your own children, begin to think of creative ways to make your family Bible study time applicable for the different dynamics you have in your home.  Maybe for your older children that can read, you can give them scripture to read throughout the week that builds upon what you are studying as a family.  Then they can express to you their thoughts and ideas about the passages that they are reading.  You are able to give them some insight into what they are reading or answer some of the questions that they may have.

For your younger children it is usually best for you to sit down one on one with them and explain the simple truths that are found in the scriptures you are studying.  Give them an opportunity to express, in front of everyone else, how they are responding to the scriptures.  Ask probing questions; “Who made the world?” “What things did God make that are in the world?”  Questions like these get children excited about the scriptures.  They are able to think form their opinion and then share what they know with others.

Most of all, you need to pick a time that you have a captive audience.  So often we, as families, are running so hard that we don’t slow down long enough to cultivate this family relationship with God.  Create a time.  Maybe you need to pick a night out of the week for everyone to have dinner at the table. At this point you have a captive audience.  Make your dinner conversation about the scriptures.  Put your Bible on the table next to your plate and share with your family the Word.

This has been a very broad question to cover in just a few short paragraphs.  Because of that I want to spend the next couple of weeks/months breaking each of these age categories down into greater detail.  Take an opportunity to begin this process of family discipleship.  Yes, it will be difficult at first.  That is only because the enemy doesn’t want it to work.  As parents, this is the most important thing that you can do for your family.  I challenge you to start today.

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[i] Richards, Larry, and Gary J. Bredfeldt. Creative Bible Teaching. Chicago: Moody, 1998. 270-71. Print.

[ii] D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones, Knowing the Times (Edinburgh:  Banner of Truth, 1989), 2.

[iii] Anthony, Michael J. Introducing Christian Education: Foundations for the Twenty-first Century. Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Academic, 2001. 208-09. Print.

[iv] Ibid., 209 – 210.

[v] Richards, Creative Bible Teaching, p. 274.

[vi] Anthony, Introducing Christian Education, p. 210 – 211.

[vii] Ibid,. p. 211 – 212.

[viii] Weddle, Linda Massey. “Older Elementary.” How to Raise a Modern-day Joseph: a Practical Guide for Growing Great Kids. Colorado Springs, CO: David C. Cook, 2009. 94-95. Print.

[ix] Barna, George. Transforming Children into Spiritual Champions. Ventura, CA: Regal, 2003. 57-59. Print.

[x] Anthony, Introducing Christian Education, p. 212 – 213.

As For Me and My House Moments – Session 14

God Provides a Mediator for His People Week 14

As For Me and My House Moments – Session 13

God Reveals Himself in His Word Week 13